Dear Me -
I can’t quite recall when the physical abuse started, but it was a long time ago. I also can’t remember what pushed me over the edge, but it couldn’t have been just one thing. Your mind endured years of verbal abuse from so-called friends that you tried to ignore and forget. The words suddenly became unspoken and transformed into your reality. I can’t craft a decent enough apology to undo all the deprivation. Please know that I do recognize this and my mission thus forward is to redeem myself.
Even though I finally permitted you to indulge in delicious delicacies, I still spent a number of years pushing you down. If it wasn’t the ill fitting clothes, it was the way in which my white, chubby frame blinded me in florescent illuminated dressing rooms. I hoped to not pass a mirror or window for fear of seeing that ugly girl – Me. Time eventually healed this oozing wound. Only a small scar was left behind.
Today, I can stand tall knowing that I have overcome so much in my life. I love the person who is writing this letter and I hope to reflect the same sunshine to my daughters. I am beautiful. I am hopeful that, one day, I’ll accept everything about myself that society shuns or air brushes. I walk into this next chapter knowing that sagging skin, wrinkles, cellulite and stretch marks are just battle wounds of being a strong woman. Watch me shine.
Love,
Me.
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